It’s been about a month and a half since my family packed up and left New Jersey to come back to our home in Colorado. Wow! It has been a whirlwind since we returned too!
After 5 years of praying and begging my brothers and sisters to come out and visit, they finally took the plunge and decided to come out…9 days after our return date!
That was a wonderful surprise which allowed me to very intentionally unpack, clean and purge some items, before they got here. There was definitely a sense of excitement because not only were we coming back home to the familiar, but also because two of my six sisters, their family and even a nephew from another of my sisters children was coming to visit, for a total of about one week.
We really enjoyed having all of them come to stay with us for about 4 days each. We went to places like the Georgetown Loop, which we hadn’t gone to before. I also took them to the familiar places like downtown Denver, via the metro, and the Buffalo Bill Burial place and museum. This was all a new experience for them. Just being out of California and driving through all the beautiful countryside and other highways was a new experience in itself.
To clarify, when I say we, I mean the girls and I because even though my whole family came back from New Jersey, Troy had to return to New Jersey for work. So, he was gone for the whole time that we had my family over. Thankfully, they were all very grateful to be in Colorado and were understanding of the situation. SO, they were very helpful if I needed anything like buying a replacement car for me because Troy’s had been totaled in an accident just one month before we came back.
Did I mention that before? Well, one month before moving back, Troy was rear ended on the NJ Turnpike and his car ended up being totaled. It was by God’s grace that Troy got away practically scoot free and was not visibly injured. So, while my family was here I had to replace that car and one of my brother’s-in- law graciously came with me and helped me make sure I wasn’t given a hard time. That was a success and I now have a new used vehicle!
Troy did finally return from NJ for about another 9 days. He was able to enjoy a family vacation (away from our “New Jersey Vacation”) with us in Estes Park just before he was off again to New Jersey.
SO, needless to say, God is continually showing me how much I need Him through all of this life stuff, especially when I don’t have my husband by my immediate side.
Three weeks ago, I also started home schooling my children again, and that has been the usual battle. No one really likes to have to start “school” again, but it’s necessary. They are doing better and liking it more now, thankfully! Needless to say, I have been struggling to stay afloat, emotionally, while keeping the home together.
A few days ago, in my not so regular, but still present morning prayer time, out of desperation I asked God to speak to me about this whole situation, and give me more peace and less anxiety. Even though I had been reading my bible, praying and meeting with my church family, I was struggling with “liking” my kids and having a more cheerful attitude, to say the least.
I asked Him, again, “Why is it so hard”? The next couple of days, in my bible study at church God revealed to me the answer!
We were studying about David in the book of 1 Samuel chapter 30. The chapter in my study was titled “Victory”.
Even though David had been chosen by God to be the next king of the Israel, he still had to personally fight many battles. And, when he did finally become King of Israel there were even more significant battles and struggles coming his way. Some of those battles involved the current king Saul, whom God had also anointed, but the people picked, not God. David was going to eventually be taking the place of Saul, because he was no longer fit to be king in God’s eyes. He also had a bigger plan through David that you can read more about in the bible.
Now, David was going to take his place, but he had to wait on God to place him there in due time and after David learned some life lessons. In the process, David was not only fighting battles for King Saul, to protect their people, but he was also being pursued by King Saul himself, out of jealousy. And, at one point David’s men were even thinking about killing David by stoning him because their families were raided, taken from their homes and all their possessions taken, while they were fighting enemy armies. They were blaming David for the consequences of the very things they signed up for. The bible says that, “David was greatly distressed because the men were talking of stoning him; each one was bitter in spirit because of his sons and daughters. But David found strength in the LORD his God.” (1 Samuel 30:11, NIV, emphasis added)
But, God had chosen him to be the next king. Why was it so hard? Why couldn’t he just come in and say, “Hey, God has chosen me to be the next king, quit whining and complaining and quit fighting me! We’re all in this together. This bad situation is not my fault!”
That’s how I feel sometimes with the situations in my life, especially with my children. “Hey, God has chosen me to be your mother and Troy your father, so quit fighting with us about what we have been called to do as your parents, and let us do our job so we can all enjoy the journey better!!”
If God didn’t make it any easier for David and He chose him to be king of a nation, then who am I to think this life and parenting thing is going to be any easier?
That’s when the light bulb went on, as usual, in my heart. In parenting, like many challenges, but rewarding callings in life, the victory is ours in Christ, if we DON’T GIVE UP and keep believing that God has already won the real war against all the sin and injustice in this world.
Life isn’t fair, but we can make it more enjoyable when we are more thankful for what we have than complain about what we don’t have yet.
I can be thankful that we are back home in Colorado even though Troy has to keep going back to New Jersey for work for a little while longer.
I can be grateful that I have a very loving and encouraging church family even though I don’t have any other relatives here. Do you get my point? I am still struggling because I am human, but I am getting it.
I just need to be more thankful and keep on living with an “attitude of gratitude” because “A thankful heart is a happy heart.” (Veggitales Movie, “Madame Blueberry” )
A happy heart makes the face cheerful, but heartache crushes the spirit. (Proverbs 15:13 NIV)
And, even though that is not my nature, I will chose to make it my nature because I would rather be grateful than not.
Finally, if I want my children to do the same, then I’d better do the same myself. “More is caught than taught!”
We’re back in Colorado and are grateful to be here even though we miss our new friends and church family in New Jersey. Come visit us soon, but call ahead 😉
Until next time…
“Devote yourselves to prayer with an alert mind and a thankful heart.” (Colossians 4:2 NLT)